Power vs. Influence

Let’s have a quick chat on the difference between power and influence.

Oftentimes, we think of power as something that is physical, almost violent, with destructive ways. It can manifest itself in constructive ways, but we often associate power with power over somebody. Or we think that somebody who is powerful is big, strong, and brawny. A powerful smell can overwhelm us on a sensory level. A power that overwhelms is not always good power. In fact, sometimes it’s not even real power. Sometimes it’s a form of bullying. Sometimes it’s a form of the incorrect usage of power.

So how does this differ from influence?

We know characters in fiction, sci-fi, and comics that have the ability to emanate a feeling of calmness or acceptance. Think of Obi-Wan Kenobi from Star Wars and his ability to make people ignore things with a wave of his hand. This is being able to influence people with your energy, your being, who you are.

Now you might be wondering, what about all that talk of empowering people or encouraging them to step into their power?

When I talk about empowering others or encourage people to step into their power, that kind of power is something that comes from within. Power that comes at the expense of others, either by comparing ourselves to them in order to feel better about who we are or by taking control of people and circumstances, is not real power but an illusion of power. Real power must come from within, from our confidence and our sense of self, not built on something outside of ourselves – something outside ourselves is too unsteady, fragile, and indicative of insecurity. We must constantly fight to maintain our control over it.

Empowered people can empower others. This is a form of influence. Stepping into one’s power may inspire and influence observers to do the same.

Anything else labelled as “influence” is bullying, manipulation, and coercion. And this brings us back to the early examples I gave of power or misuse or power, the ones associated with violence and force.

But those with the ability of influence know how to go into a situation and calm the troubled waters. They can bring clarity out of mud. It is a passive skill, at times unseen even, but it is that passive nature from which is becomes a power of its own – one that doesn’t demand, command, or threaten.